I thought about how to write this article for days. Initially I thought this would be something easy. In fact, I even volunteered to do this. Wellness isn’t just about physical fitness but about mental health too. I’m a brand ambassador for VarCity Studios but how could I, someone who is not at her best, write to inspire others to care for themselves in every aspect?
Even when I was a young child I always loved to sing. I would sing on Sunday mornings innocently thinking that the sound of eggs frying would conceal the sound of my tiny 7 year old voice. Eventually I started to become more self-aware. My ritual sunday morning jam out sessions stopped with time. Finding myself singing became a rarity. If I was lucky, nobody would be at home so then I could sing. But, that’s not the point. Singing is something I love. I always enjoyed myself while doing it.
Today I broke down in tears while doing my favorite thing, singing. This beautiful melody that I was singing turned into loud sobs that only seemed to grow. All this time I have been trying to just get by the weeks one day at a time. Meals started becoming less important to me. I would eat a bit just to say I ate. Naps were something that helped me pass the time and help me avoid reality. I didn’t want to stop and accept that I was not okay. It felt like I was draining the people around me that I loved. While everybody was excited about Senior class events, everything felt like just another day I had to trudge through. I did not want to even think that I was not okay because it almost felt like the equivalent message I would be sending was that I was being unappreciative of life. I did not want to make my family worried. I wanted to keep thinking that I was okay. However, the fact that this hobby I once enjoyed and looked forward to so much, is something I couldn’t enjoy anymore hit me in my soft spot. I was not the same, I was not okay.
I’m a wellness brand ambassador. The growth here that I tried to show you was small but it was definitely important. It’s important to acknowledge it if you are not okay. As a matter of fact, you can think of it as the first step to getting better. The eggs that I smelled during my Sunday mornings will begin to burn if I don’t acknowledge when it’s almost cooked. Getting through the problem and avoiding the problem are two completely different things.
Tomorrow is July Fourth. There is gonna be a lot of barbeque smells wafting through the air as many people are celebrating. Holidays are exciting commemorations and typically spent with close friends and family. This might not be a Fourth of July themed article the advertising persona in me would have wanted, but this goes out to those who have been feeling under the weather. It’s okay not to be okay. As Mental Health Advocate Erica Davis-Crump says, “It’s okay to not be okay. It’s even better if you get help”. To the allies hiding here and there, treat others with patience. You never know what they’re going through. Let’s get through this together.